Take a Rest and cut off the Past

Whenever something ends and you start something new, there is a grey zone, it can be long, thick, sometimes you do not even feel it, because you don’t have the time to feel. This time I took my time for the grey zone. I prepared not to prepare for the next steps and suddenly I am caught in this mix of melancholy and urge to continue. I think that it is important that you finalize the last thoughts in your head, that you mentally finish what you have started some time back. The process of mentally finishing something takes sometimes longer than actually finishing it.

I ran away after my job in Copenhagen was done. I could not get on that plane fast enough, leaving all the stress and the pressure behind. Even though I went straight into a new adventure, I was caught up by my past in dreams. It would not let me slip as fast as I wanted it to go away. My subconscious was telling me that everything experienced had importance. It also showed me what I wanted more than other things. Slowly I stopped getting haunted in my dreams.

At the end of our trip, I went to the hairdresser and got my hair cut off. It is some kind of ritual I have, every time I open a new chapter in my life. It’s like cutting off everything that happened in the past and that held you back. It helps to start fresh.

I lived the adventure of the Asian subcontinent of India and came back home happy and exhausted. Now I started my next steps. It’s extremely exciting, looking for jobs and apartments; doing one thing, dreaming of another, not having a clue whether I will be able to afford anything. The grey zone gives you space to dream. Suddenly there appear goals and longings that did not have the space in past ventures. Now, finally, I am able to think big. I want to try out new things, stuff I have put off, because “I did not have the time”. So I am practicing the guitar, with slow progress. I will learn how to sew and I will make a calendar all by myself. Who knows, when more things are settled, I might even join a choir.

So here is one advice: Whenever you finish something big, take a rest in the grey zone and from there start out to your new ventures with a smile on your face.

P.S.: The hair:

Jaipur - Muditland

After a nerve wracking trip to Mount Abu, with too much of monsoon rain and a crappy hotel, we arrived in Jaipur. Now we have reached the easy part of the trip, so I thought, as we from now on live with Indian friends of mine. Here in Jaipur, it's Mudit who picks us up from the train station.

When Mudit came to Denmark last year, it was me who taught him all about European culture and behaviour. I was so surprised when he asked me for anti bacterial soap (Dude! Evey soap is anti bacterial!), or did not know how to use a vacuum cleaner. He always took my food and laughed like a girl behind his hand, when something was funny.

Now it's him who knows how the world around works. For the first time we have the chance to see the country from behind a window, as we drive in Mudit's car. All the noise and smell is damped and we drive through the city like through a museum. It suddenly seems somehow ordered and makes some sense. When I'm out on the streets I am too aware of my bag and the traffic, here I get the chance to honk on everyone around.

I was not able to imagine where Mudit comes from. How does the Indian middle class live? Where does it start and where does it end? Mudit lives outside the city in a huge house, with a great staircase and so little furniture in it. His parents are loving, make a lot of food for us and just express their happiness for our visit. They asked, who of us is Anna and when I said it was me, they smiled, finally knowing who the friend was, Mudit told them about last year. It is eye opening to see how much they give for their son and how proud they are about his achievements. It is touching me to see how he takes care of them and how he translates, so we all understand each other. Finally, now that I see where he comes from, I understand Mudit. Friends just share things, that's why he always took my food and they help each other in every way possible.

Mudit is our proud guide showing us the many castles of Jaipur and other sights such as temples and museums. On the way in the car, he does not forget to mention that there is the hotel where he wants to get married and the other place is where men go for porn. The reason for why supermarkets are a failure in India, is that they are just too slow and don't get how to use a cash machine. Recently they prohibited the use of plastic bags in Rajastan, so you have to carry your shopping. It's stupid! Not the bags, the working culture in India!

I love to be here and see Jaipur through Mudits eyes. He is a friend to keep and Jaipur is a city to return to.